Regenerate Read online

  The girls audibly gasp, and Raxtin’s hand instantly drops from my back. Zeph slips over and tucks herself into Rax’s other side, her fingers encircling his arm just above his elbow. “She’s not spoken for, at least not like that.”

  Ugh. And loser of the year award goes to . . . Seriously, can we just hang a flashing sign around my neck?

  Zeph continues, “We’re all just good, long-time friends, Lander.”

  Lander’s gaze sweeps across the three of us and back again. “Clearly,” he says.

  Is he being sarcastic or affirmative? We are friends; what does he know about anything?

  “Sorry about the unwarranted hostility,” says Zeph. Her head turns a fraction in my direction. “We really are glad you’re here. We could use more GAPs around.”

  Who the heck is she to say my hostility is unwarranted? Zephani can be so arrogant.

  Kachina glides between the four of us, her hands held up like an olden-day crosswalk aide. “That’s totally true. Lander, you are more than welcome to hang with us. Averi’s not usually like that, sorry.”

  Hellooo! I’m right here! What’s with my friends today?

  She slides closer to Jett and keeps talking. “It’s super cool to have a new GAP in the village. That almost never happens. And I’m sure we all hope you enjoy it here as much as…where did you say you were from?”

  “The Colorado colony,” he says.

  “That’s right. Well, we hope it’s as nice for you as Colorado was. And besides, you round our group out to a nice even six.”

  I bristle at what her observation implies. And he’s part of our group now? Just like that? I don’t say anything. I roll my eyes and occupy myself by looking at the perfectly circular ring cut in the synthetic lawn around the base of each tree. Is that how grass grows in the wild? I doubt it. I wish I could climb up these trees or run into the wild and hide from everyone.

  “Thanks for the welcome,” says Lander, his voice pulling me back. “It’s really nice of you all.”

  I glare at him from the corner of my eye. Yeah, such a nice, warm welcome. Feels like he’s already more a member of our group than I am.

  Lander runs a hand through his wavy blond hair. “I’m not one to squeeze myself in where I’m not wanted, though.” Unexpectedly, he turns to me, and all other eyes of our group follow. His bright cobalt eyes lock with mine. “Are you all right with my being here?”

  Chapter Three

  I pull back a little. I really, really want to say no, even if it’s just to spite him. But I can feel the gaze of the rest of the group boring into me. Especially Zeph and Kachina.

  A sharp sigh escapes my nostrils and my shoulders rise then drop. “Sure. Fine. Whatever.” I turn sharply so I don’t have to see everyone’s responses and grab my bi-ped. “Let’s go, we’re going to be late.”

  Why on earth did Lander want my consent specifically? Obviously he didn’t need it. It was probably just to humiliate me, forcing me to openly accept him in front of everyone after I’d told him to leave me alone. I hate being manipulated. Lander is sly. I’d better be on my guard around him.

  As we pedal to school, I let myself lag at the back of our group. The ash-elms and large oval windows of the residence columns blur past. The only thing that grabs my focus is the imposing shadow of the V.D.R.C.’s building. It’s the one structure in the village left to rot and ruin. I’ve been told its interior has been moderately maintained, but the outside is sun-bleached and some letters in the name have fallen off.

  “What’s with the massive eye sore?” Lander laughs and points towards the structure.

  Zeph snorts. “That? That was the last failed attempt to reclaim our parents.”

  Jett shakes his head, turning away from it. “Yeah, and I doubt any of them ever used it. Waste of resources if you ask me.”

  None of them have actually answered Lander’s question. Is it really so hard for us GAPs to talk about it directly? I clear my throat. “It’s called the Virtual Dependence Rehabilitation Center. It was supposed to help our parents wean off their tech and devices so they could live like normal people. It didn’t work.”

  Lander slows to gawk a little longer at the place, conveniently situating himself closer to me. “Wow, that’s really a . . . thing.”

  Kachina looks at him over her shoulder. “Didn’t your village have one?”

  “No. It didn’t.” Lander looks down at his bi-ped as if checking the polarity adjustor. I think he’s frowning.

  Jett pokes out his chin towards the building. “Weird. I thought every village had one of those.”

  Lander finishes recalibrating his bi-ped’s magnets and stares blankly ahead. “Guess they didn’t think ours needed one.” His forearms cord and bulge from the pressure of his grip.

  It’s strange the way he talks about it, mechanical and flat. Like it wasn’t even a consideration, or maybe he wished it’d been an option. Judging by his sudden death grip on his handle bars, something about that place clearly cuts him deeper then he’s letting on.

  We pedal a while longer in silence, till Lander finally breaks it.

  “Earlier you mentioned you’re all longtime friends. How do you know each other?” he asks the collective group.

  “Oh, we grew up together,” says Kachina.

  “Yep, born and raised here, the lot of us,” Jett chimes in. “Ain’t that right, Rax?”

  “Yup,” Rax says with a sigh. Wow, he’s a real conversationalist this morning.

  “Impressive,” Lander says. “Don’t you ever wonder what it would be like to live somewhere else, though?”

  It’s like I can hear Zephani’s nose wrinkle by her superior tone. “No. Why?”

  “I do,” I say. Wait, why on earth did I just say that? Do I?

  “You do?” Zeph says, scowling at me over her shoulder. “Yeah right. Since when?”

  I look down at the slow, pedaling movement of my feet. “I don’t know. Seems interesting, I guess.”

  Lander glances towards the cloudy grey sky and squints. “There is something to be said for staying near your roots and not having to adjust. But Averielle is right.” He pauses and catches my eye, then winks at me. “Seeing more of the world definitely opens up your perspective.”

  Is that what I said? I don’t think my knee-jerk answer qualifies for that deep interpretation.

  However, though I hate to admit it, coming to my defense like that was nice of him. I wonder why he bothered to?

  My steps feel lighter than they have all day as I head to my favorite learning unit of B day, agriculture. Even though we don’t use real soil and dirt to grow our food, I guess they thought it was important the art not be completely forgotten.

  Rax slips beside me as I walk. “Mind if I join you?” he says.

  I glance over at him, but he just stares straight ahead. The muscles of his jaw are twitching like when he’s nervous and has his poker face on. “Of course I don’t mind.” We’ve walked to our joint units together since we were six. In fact, for most of our lives, the majority of our units have wound up being together. “It’s so weird they switched our units up midway through the year.”

  Rax’s bold brown eyebrows pinch and he nods. “I know, and now ag is the only unit we have together that’s—you know”—he clears his throat—“just the two of us.” He rolls his shoulders and tries to play off his last words.

  What he really means is our only unit together without Zephani. “Well, I’m glad they at least left us one,” I say, then I break into a smile. “The best one.”

  In my peripheral I can see the dimple in his cheek from his grin. I miss seeing that as often as I used to. Relationships are such strange things. Or maybe the strangeness comes from our generation having never seen them modeled in real life.

  In agriculture we are transplanting young willowspen trees into larger hydroponic vats. It’s a little tedious, but it’s nice to be working with my hands. They really are pretty little things anyway, and the latest development in h
ybrid trees. Rax has been pretty quiet the whole time. I keep catching him watching me with those hazel eyes of his. He’s been strange the last few days. It’s like he’s got something to say and won’t spit it out.

  As I pass by him this time, I nudge his shoulder with mine to get his attention.

  His head snaps towards me and he stops.

  “Rax,” I whisper. “We should challenge Ko and Breck to see which team can transplant the most saplings in the next ten minutes.”

  He glances over at them and then back to me with a smirk. “Ok, how do you want to do it?”

  After we formulate our system, Rax issues the challenge.

  The two of us work assembly style. I remove the tree from the smaller vat and hand it off to Rax, who places it into the larger one. Our system is fast and efficient.

  The other two are struggling and keep almost running into each other as they speed back and forth.

  Rax grins at me as we work and gives a nod of approval. I hold the next plant out to him, but as he goes to take it, his warm hand slips over the top of mine. We both jump and pull back at the same time, dropping the tree on the ground in the process.

  We stand there staring at each other for a long, awkward moment. His Adam’s apple bobs as he gulps, while I gnaw on my lower lip.

  It’s far too quiet in the room. Why? I glance around. The rest of the unit, even the other team, have stopped and are staring at us.

  Heat rushes to my cheeks and I duck behind my hair. I drop to one knee, scooping up the sapling and pieces of spilt synthetic pumice.

  Rax joins me in my effort and I can’t get myself to look up at him. I shouldn’t have jumped so bad. After all, it’s just Raxtin.

  Rax clears his throat. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”

  I shake my head without looking up. “It’s ok. Sorry it startled me so bad.”

  I hand him the remaining pieces of pumice, careful not to brush his hand as I do so.

  When we rise to our feet, the rest of the room has resumed what they were doing. The other team claims their victory and we congratulate them just as the hall buzzer signals the unit’s end.

  Rax and I wash off our hands in adjoining sinks. Usually we stay and chat until the last second, but he seems kind of antsy today.

  He finishes before me and grabs for a towel. “I’d better take off,” he says, avoiding looking at me. “I’ve got chem labs next and I really need to not blow anything up this time if I’m ever going to get a passing score.”

  I clap a hand over my mouth and can’t help my snort as I bust out a laugh.

  He sets his jaw askew and shakes his head. “Dad’s been ticked he hasn’t been able to share my report card on his brag page for months.”

  “Well, you could get Kachina’s help with that,” I say.

  He rolls his eyes like I’m crazy. “Whatever, Kachina’s worse than I am at chem.”

  I glance around to make sure no one is close enough to hear. “True, but she figured out how to hack in and change her score. At least for her chem unit.”

  His eyes practically bug out of his head. “WHAT? Are you serious? When?”

  “For the last several months, I think. Jett probably had something to do with it, but after the first time, it’s been all her.”

  Rax takes a wide stance. He folds his arms then shakes his head. “I can’t believe Jett didn’t tell me. He knows I’m failing chem.”

  I brace my still-damp fists on my hips and scowl at him. “Maybe he thought you should actually figure out how to do your work. That way you won’t blow yourself up when you’re expected to do something you supposedly know.”

  He purses his lips to avoid smiling but nods his head. “I suppose there’s probably some wisdom in that.”

  He watches me for a moment longer. His gaze is soft and happy and he studies my face as if there’s always more to discover. You’d think after eleven years he’d have me memorized by now. I’m glad he apparently doesn’t.

  He straightens and clears his throat. “Guess I’d better get going.”

  He practically speed walks to the door, past the rows of blazzberry bushes. Part of me wishes I had something to say to make him stick around a little longer. I forgot how nice it is to talk to someone real once in a while.

  While gathering my things into my pack, I spy a small bag of soil stuffed in the top of the trash receptacle at the far corner. I glance around, but everyone is either leaving or distracted, and the virtually transmitted teacher, Mrs. Cobalta, is answering a question for another student. I swing by the bin on my way out the door and slip the bag into the open zipper on my shoulder pack before exiting the room.

  Just as I slide out the door, I bump into a nicely cut torso in a bright blue shirt. “Raxtin?” I start in surprise. “What are you doing? I thought you had labs.”

  His hands are on my shoulders to steady me, but now they jerk away. “Yeah, I do, sorry.” His jaw muscles are twitching like crazy again. “I just . . ." He pauses and looks around, then takes ahold of my arm, ushering me to a more discreet section of the hall, next to the holographic trophy display.

  I glance down at his hand, which is still holding my arm. A strange, pleasant kind of knot forms in my stomach at his contact. “What’s up?” I ask, tucking my hair behind one ear.

  He lets go, and instantly I miss it. What is wrong with me?

  “I just forgot I wanted to ask if I could meet up with you sometime in the next few days.”

  “We’re meeting up at the diner on Thursday.”

  He blinks rapidly and clears his throat. “No. I mean, I know, but I meant just the two of us.”

  “Ok?” Is it just me, or did he put extra emphasis that last part? It makes me want to smile, but I refrain. Instead, I adjust the weight of my now-burdened pack.

  “It’s nothing weird,” he says in a rush, eyeing two passersby. “I just have an early birthday present I wanted to give you before all the big village celebration stuff next week.”

  “I forgot that’s next weekend.” I sigh. The lightness that was in my chest now feels like someone put a boulder on it. I eye Raxtin. “You mean in case I make a fool of myself again like last year, don’t you?”

  “No, I mean without all the people around. It’s nothing really, just something I kinda put together and wanted to surprise you with. But not with the others all watching and stuff.”

  A warmth fills me, and a smile that I can’t hide spreads across my lips. “Wow, that’s really nice of you, Rax. Thanks.”

  I can’t imagine what it would be, or why he doesn’t even want our friends around for it. Rax keeps shifting his weight and looks so nervous I figure I’d better not press for explanations. “Yeah, that’d be great,” I say.

  His exhale is so big it’s like a gust of wind, and it blows my hair. The nearby row of personals cabinets, are starting to look deserted, and the hall is emptying out fast. “When and where did you have in mind?” I ask.

  “Well, I’ve got chem study work tonight and Zeph wants me to take her to the new post-modern art exhibit tomorrow—”

  “How about Friday after school then?” I cut him off, not really wanting to hear all their plans; it gives me a strange, sick feeling in my gut.

  He swallows and nods vigorously. “Yeah, that’d be perfect. Should we meet at our old haunt, say six thirty?”

  I bite my lip. I’ve never thought of the hydrogarden towers as “our old haunt,” but I guess it is. “Ok. The towers at six thirty on Friday.”

  “Ok. Oh, and Averi, don’t mention meeting me there to anyone. You know—to your mom or anyone.”

  Or to your girlfriend? “Sure. I won’t.”

  He nods stiffly again and reaches as if to pat my shoulder, then pulls his hand back and gives me an air fist bump. “See ya,” he says, then turns and practically runs down the hall.

  What was all that was about? Just what exactly is this gift?

  So far today, an A day, hasn’t been too terrible, even with Lander s
tealing all our group’s attention at lunch. He still calls me Shrieker, and though he won’t tell anyone else why, I’m still ticked about the title. Why can’t he just let it alone already?

  Raxtin has gone back to pretending I’m not really here. I don’t know what was up yesterday. Having him ask me to meet him privately made it hard to get through the rest of yesterday and all of this morning. I find myself constantly speculating what it is he wants to give me and why he wants us to be alone when he does.

  As we sit at lunch, I let my gaze wander around the polymer glass dining hall. Lander is telling some larger-than-life—or rather, larger-than-truth—story about an actual wild bear chasing him down a path during a nature walk. If he’s going to try and impress us with made-up stories, he should at least make them plausible. Everyone knows GAPs don’t get to take nature walks out in the wild. But despite the clearly falsified facts of, well, pretty much his entire story, every person at the table is transfixed on his telling of it. Several girls have come from other tables just to listen.

  I roll my eyes and continue looking around. Half the plates are untouched still. Lander must have started on his meal before he began his oratory, cause all that’s left are a few vegetables and some fruit slices.

  My gaze leaves our table, and I look around at the rest of the cafeteria. Then it strikes me, every table is drawn in like ours, each with one or more people at the center of attention. And at each table’s center of attention is a face I don’t recognize. There’s no way there could suddenly be that many new GAPs.

  “Are there a bunch of visitors today?” I ask.

  Everyone glances at me--oops, I just interrupted the liar--then turns back to Lander without bothering to respond.

  Zeph slides closer and whispers, “No. There were a dozen new transfers brought in last week.”

  “A dozen? Why?” I can’t help the gasp in my voice. In a school of only eighty-seven GAPs, twelve new transfers is crazy.

  “No one knows really.” She points over towards Lander. “Lander came to live with his last surviving relative. But some of the others didn’t give any reason. There are rumors the Local Organizers wanted to bring in new blood and mix things around a bit since most of us should be pairing up soon, but no one knows for sure.”